Difficult children: why they become so, and how to properly educate them
Very often young moms complain that they can not find a common language with the child. At the same time, everyone compares an already grown-up baby with a newly born baby and envies those mothers who, without knowing the worries and problems, quietly raise their children. However, this comparison is stupid, because for a certain age, their habits are also characteristic, so it is necessary to learn how to distinguish the ordinary activity of a child from the developing "problem". In relation to disobedient babies, the expression "difficult children" is most often used. They can completely not listen to their parents, be too independent, harmful, stubborn, but do not forget that these are just kids. With proper education, even difficult children become the most ordinary, quiet, affectionate and loving babies.
Problems of this nature often arise in young parents who are still learning to raise their first child. The slightest mistake, and the baby is already starting to behave badly. And in this situation, we can say that it is the parent, not the child, that is to blame. It must always be remembered that it is our communication with children that can cause both positive and negative results. It is only natural that a crumb who constantly hears only the cry of his own mother becomes sooner or later indifferent to him. As a result, out of a normal baby, an embittered teenager grows up, who in the future will also raise his children in the same way. Therefore, difficult children are nothing but the result of improper parenting.
Raising a voice on her child, the mother often justifies her behavior by the fact that she is afraid of accustoming the baby to such behavior. On the one hand, the fear is really understandable, because if the child does not hear "no" and get permissiveness, he can behave in absolutely any way and very quickly get used to this. However, the situation is twofold, and you should learn to see the face when you can raise your voice to a child, and when it is better to let you do what you want.
Let's imagine that your baby has stopped listening and does only what his heart desires. First of all, it is necessary to understand that the education of difficult children is a laborious and long enough process, so have patience. What positions are suitable in this situation, we will describe below.
- Do not forbid him everything in the world. Such withdrawal and constant prohibitions only embitter the child and do not give him freedom. Let him try to draw on the wall - it will be easy to erase, but he will see that he was allowed to do it. In the future, you just need to explain to the child that you can draw on paper, and the walls should be clean. Repeating this several times without shouting, you will see the result in a few weeks.
- Do not scold him at all. This affects your child too much and creates a number of complexes. If the kid has done something out of the ordinary, it's better to tell him quietly that you can not do this than break out into an angry tirade for half an hour.
- Do not beat the child in any way. This approach is immoral.
- Do not protect it from everything in the world. Very often the mother tries to protect her child from any problems. It is advisable to do this when the child is still very small, but a grown-up kid needs to commit some kind of stupidity and mistakes. This is gaining experience, which is sure to come in handy in the future. Giving the child a detailed briefing for each action, you risk growing a person who can not make independent decisions.
Difficult children are very quickly re-educated, if everything is done correctly. Let your child feel your care (but not excessive), and then everything will be good and trouble-free.