How to wean a child for any reason? Childhood Psychology
Whims of a child can spoil the mood of the whole family. Have you planned an interesting walk, and a son or daughter, instead of rejoicing, bother you with whining? Try to stay calm and do not swear. In order to understand how to wean a child, it is necessary to establish the reasons for this behavior.
Bad behavior is a requirement of attention
Most likely, you will be surprised, but in the child's bad behavior, in most cases, his parents are guilty. Their whims and whining children usually seek to attract attention. Even if it is not the most positive reaction, the little one will be flattered by the very fact of interest to his person. The child constantly whines and fits without reason, and it seems to you that he "does not know what he wants"? Most likely, the reason for this behavior lies precisely in the lack of attention of parents. We, the adults, are often overly absorbed in our own worries and problems. Try to assess how much time you give your child. It's about those moments when parents are completely focused on communicating with the baby. Perhaps, you should reconsider part of your views on the upbringing of the child, and then hysterics and nagging will remain in the past?
Quitting as a manifestation of fatigue
A long shopping trip or a long stay at a boring event - what can be more exhausting in terms of the child? And very soon your six-year-old daughter behaves like a very small girl. It is cold and hot at the same time, I want to have a drink and sleep. "But my child is not a whiner, what happened to him?" - you are amazed. In fact, everything is simple - he overtired. How to wean a child in public places? It is desirable not to allow fatigue as such, it is harmful to the child's nervous system. If the day ahead of your family is a busy day, try to think in advance about the organization of breaks. Save a good mood for the child will help change the types of activity. After a long walk, it's nice to sit in a cafe, after watching the performance it's interesting to take a walk. And, most importantly, during this busy day, do not forget from time to time to be interested in the child's well-being and ask if he does not need something.
The kid constantly whines and demands
In some families, sobs and hysterical harassment are audible around the clock. The child asks for sweets, toys, and then with howls proves that he does not want and will not do something. What is it, does the kid have such a nasty character? If the child constantly whines, demonstrating his desire to achieve something, he most likely believes that this tactic will help him. All children check for the strength of their parents. Repeated requests, whining, demonstrative disobedience - this is only a small part of the arsenal, which the kids experience the nerves of adults. But if it is hysterics and whining that become the favorite instruments of a particular child, think, perhaps, he is spoiled? If you at least once in a similar situation fulfilled the requirement of the baby, he will remember such an experience as positive. How can we wean the child in such a case? Be patient and be prepared for the fact that getting rid of a bad habit will take some time.
How to rehabilitate a spoiled child?
Never allow "only once" what is usually forbidden. With this democratic education, the next time it will be difficult for the child to understand how much he is scolded for something that was permitted earlier. If whims and nagging were encouraged by satisfying the wishes of the baby, it would be difficult to wean him from such behavior. Start with a serious conversation. Remind the son or daughter that you are always ready to hear and discuss any of their requests and desires, but only on condition that they are said to be calm in tone. The success of this conversation is greatly influenced by the age of the child. With preschoolers older than three or four years, it's not difficult to agree. It is only necessary to show a little patience and remind the child of the contract, if necessary. How should parents behave if hysterics has already begun? There are proven ways to stop crying and demands.
I can not hear whining!
What to do, the child whines, croaks and screams. This behavior can greatly upset or even anger the parents. Stay calm, even if only outwardly. Approach the baby and say that you will not talk to him and listen to him until he calms down. After that, you should pretend that you really do not hear crying or yelling. Some mothers even demonstratively put on headphones or go to another room. Be prepared for the baby not to be silenced right away. In addition, this behavior of the mother may even more strongly encourage him or even offend him. But believe me, very soon you will notice that hysterics began to occur much less often. If after the child calms down, he does not fit first, it will be appropriate to ask him what he wanted to ask.
Distractions and entertainments
One of the best ways of how to wean a child for any reason is to learn how to quickly switch his attention. Mom's task is to catch the first whiny tones in the baby's voice and immediately offer him some interesting activity or game. This trick works in almost any situation. Even if the baby started to whine, just say or show him something unusual and unexpected. This is a real salvation against whims and hysteria on the street or in any public place. Did the child whimper at the most inopportune moment? Suggest a look at the bird or a passing car, in the store pay attention to the decoration of the storefront. The psychology of childhood is such that the thirst for knowledge and curiosity persists in any mood. Stop nagging can be, just saying something unexpected that will outrage the child. Baby wants to buy a new toy, choking tears? Ask if he really changed his mind about going for a walk today? Most children, after hearing such an unexpected question, are lost. Usually the child begins to prove that his mother misunderstood him, and he did not want to say it at all.
Role games like all preschoolers. Very often, kids under the age of 7, specifically or unconsciously, tend to be like fairy-tale characters that they like. So why not remind the dilapidated child about the need to strive for the chosen ideal? Any little girl dreams of becoming a princess, but are these real princesses whining? And the brave knights and superheroes that your son likes so much? Look for examples of non-conflicting and polite characters in cartoons and books. When viewing and reading, pay attention to the child's positive qualities of the characters. Discuss the situations in the magical story of the situation and praise the main characters for calm and endurance.
Look at you!
You can distract a child from hysteria by showing him how this behavior looks from the outside. If the baby whimpers for some time, you can bring him to the mirror. The most important thing is to keep a calm tone of voice and refrain from excessive expression. Flushed cheeks, tear-stained face, narrow eyes and tousled hair - that's what most babies look like during whims. Ask the child if he likes this appearance. Most likely, at the same time the baby will stop whimpering. Take this pause and ask the little crybaby to go wash and comb her hair. How can we wean the child for any reason and without? When watching cartoons or reading fairy tales, pay attention to the characters who behave in this way. Remind the kid that such behavior is unacceptable, and even book heroes could behave more calmly and positively.
List of prohibited phrases and techniques
What's to hide, childish whining and hysteria are capable of getting anyone out of themselves. The simplest and most logical action in this situation seems to be to scold the kid and remind him that behaving in this manner is indecent and unacceptable. Try to refrain from such actions. If you really want to understand how to wean your child, you need to show restraint. In no case do not abuse the baby, do not insult him and do not set as an example of calmer peers. Such a tactic will not lead to success, but it can injure a baby. Beware of pattern phrases like "good girls do not behave themselves" or "real men do not cry." Your task is to gradually wean the child from improper behavior, gently distracting him during hysterics and demonstrating that nothing can be achieved by whining.
What should I do if my child is constantly aching at the age of three?
All the above tips will help cope with the hysteria of the preschooler, with whom you can agree. And what if the baby who has not turned three years old whines? This age of the child is characterized by a significant desire to communicate in conjunction with the inability to express their thoughts in words, sentences. Children only learn to speak and want to constantly be in the spotlight. Misunderstanding or ignoring can greatly upset the baby. How to behave with a small whiner right? Do not throw all your business and immediately run to the child as soon as he whimpered. But you can not ignore such hysterics. Their cause is most often the lack of attention or natural physiological needs. If the baby cried, make sure that it's time to change it or he does not want to eat. If the diaper is dry, but the baby has eaten recently, then it's time to play with your mom!